Get Your Groom Involved

Plan TOGETHER! Getting married is a couple’s affair.

While some women don’t mind if their betrothed merely simply shows up at the church on time wearing a tux, many women would like the groom to play a larger role in the wedding planning process. 

Rather than nag, manipulate, or complain, try the following tips to get the groom more involved:

* Engage the groom in a few key wedding tasks.  While your fiancé may not be interested in much of the planning, there are most likely some tasks that he will get excited about.   Depending on his interests, your fiancé may enjoy researching limousine rental companies, hiring the band or disc jockey, visiting reception venues, planning the rehearsal barbeque, researching the directions to the ceremony and reception sites for the invitations, or managing the overall wedding budget.

* Involve the groom in any activities that involve food.  If the stomach is the way to a man’s heart, feeding the groom is a way to involve him in wedding planning.  Be sure to invite him to all catering and cake tasting events.  When your groom has an opinion about the food, listen to what he says and incorporate his thoughts in the final plans.

* Combine wedding errands with an activity your fiancé enjoys.  If you’d like your fiancé to spend a Saturday morning with you visiting reception venues or interviewing photographers, offer to have lunch at his favorite restaurant or catch a movie that afternoon.

* Involve him in the gift registry process.  Grooms may not be too excited about gift registry until they realize they’re essentially shopping for items they will receive for free.  Popular today is the concept of a “man registry” in which grooms can sign up for power tools, barbeques, or sports memorabilia.  This concept may be highly appealing to your man.

* Have realistic expectations.  Let’s face it: many wedding tasks involve “girl stuff” that guys simply aren’t into.  If you want your guy to participate in more of the wedding planning, don’t expect him to get excited about activities that involve taffeta, tulips, or tulle fabric.  Lowering your expectations for your fiancé will increase your overall happiness and make him more willing to help out in other areas.

* Tell your fiancé that you would appreciate his help.  Planning a wedding is stressful, no matter how much help you get.  When all else fails, sometimes the best way to engage a groom in wedding planning is to simply tell him that you need his help.  If you don’t ask for the help, your fiancé may assume you have everything under control.

If a bride and groom can successfully plan a wedding together, they can do just about anything.  Once the groom gets “engaged” in the process, the couple may be surprised to find out how much fun wedding planning can be.